A Day At The Spa: Aug. 19, Racetrack Humor

A collection of noteworthy quotes from last week's backside meanderings...

“We believe you. Thousands wouldn’t.” – Trainer in response to exercise rider’s elaborate late-to-work excuse.

“Sure, I’ll ride her back. She’s worth more today than she was yesterday, even though she wasn’t worth two dead flies a few races ago.” – Calvin Borel's agent, Jerry Hissam, to Neil Howard regarding a second-place finisher.

“Don’t tell me to take Route 9, there’s like 500 Route 9s.” – jockey agent Richard Depass, getting directions from trainer Donna Ward.

“It’s quite difficult to hotwalk with your fingers crossed, actually.” – Michael Matz employee Iain Holmes, on waiting to hear if he’ll still have a job with the trainer’s string when the Saratoga meet comes to an end.

“He’s not a player, he’s a social engineer.” – clockers gossiping about the escapades of a well-known jockey.

“I was down on the rail getting ready to shoot the break, and somebody said ‘Rudy Giuliani is here,’ and I was like, ‘The horses don’t matter anymore, get Giuliani!’” – photographer on Rudy Giuliani’s surprise visit to Saratoga Aug. 16.

“They should have jockey hockey, it sounds better.” - The Daily News’ Sherry Ross, discussing last week’s jockey basketball fundraiser for Andrew Lakeman.

“I’ll tell you what’s wrong up here this year – everyone’s getting old. You don’t hear those stories any more about that guy ending up face down on the floor at the Parting Glass.” – cell phone conversation overheard near Oklahoma Training Track.

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